I could only think , feel fear, shame. Long before I cheated the husband would ridicule me about anything I did to groom and look like a normal person " who you fucking!" he would shout as I got dressed to go to town. No one, I would cry but not even feel the tears running down my face. As though they were a normal part of it.
It has been so hot here today's high being 82. In order to be comfortable I need to wear sleeveless.
A few months ago while sitting in the hot tub with him he noticed the hair. He said"why don't you ever shave". I responded that I didn't want to be accused of anything.
I think he felt something, but i really don't care anymore.
I wish the knee jerk reaction I have when I go about my day to things he says will go away. soon
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